Sunday, February 13, 2005

An Open Letter to the Left-Wing Fraud Machine

Dear Douchebags:

It has now been over three months since the 2004 Presidential elections. After yet another humiliating defeat, your officials, mouthpieces and various bobos went forth and pontificated to anyone who would listen that even though you lost again your party would "ensure that every vote is counted". That was a clever diversionary turn of phrase. But I'll get to that in a moment.

Do you realize that in the entire modern history of this union, the only major instances of electoral fraud I can muster have been perpetrated by your side? Be it the local political machines that dominated cities like Chicago, Teamster ballot-filling-out parties, or the stolen presidential election of 1960, the word "Democrat" has always been synonymous with "electoral sleaze".

But you guys went running around, in many cases before election day, shouting "Republicans are stealing the election! Irregularities! Intimidation! Long lines in black neighborhoods!"

Psychologists have a term for this: they call it "projection". This is the act of accusing another of the character flaws of the accuser himself. It's like a kleptomaniac calling an innocent person "thief".

Well, a-holes, you were all purple faced over the prospect of Republican electoral fraud based solely on the quite compelling evidence that "you lost" and nothing more. Meanwhile, your shenanigans were well documented in East St. Louis, Washington state, and now in the ever-inflating scandal being unraveled in Milwaukee. Just to illustrate an example of actual evidence of electoral fraud, because y'all are too stupid to figure it out or too evil to care, would be, oh say, votes cast exceeding voter rolls by as much as 5% in 24 heavily democratic precincts. How about if I just quote an anecdote from the newspaper:

In the case of Ward 297, the logbook showed 590 more voters than votes, and in Ward 314, the books showed a difference of 507 votes. Both wards voted at Jericho Baptist Church, 1923 N. 12th St., on the city's north side.

Having lived over half of my life in Milwaukee, I can tell you with almost 100% confidence that none of those overvotes went for Bush. Republicans who happen into that particular neighborhood tend to get shot. Or they are just stopping by to purchase some cocaine.

That's evidence. "We lost so the system is screwed up or they cheated" is not.

Other evidence of Democrat electoral mischief, in Milwaukee alone, includes:
  • The bribing of homeless people with cigarettes to vote for Gore (2000)
  • College students admitting to television news reporters that they voted several times (2000)
  • The sons of two prominent Milwaukee democrats slashing tires of vehicles rented by the GOP to take indigents and shut-ins to the polls on election day-eve. (For the record, one of the tire slashers, the son of US Representative Gwen Moore, is named Supreme Solar Allah.)

So you can see why we laugh at you when you say you want "every vote counted". Of course you do - "every vote" includes fraudulent ones too. How dare we disenfranchise dead people!

Well I think that you folks are at the end of your run. No longer will you be able to fashion yourselves as the defenders of the franchise while simulaneously trying to wreck it. Because we're watching you now.

And aren't you guys just a little concerned that you even have to cheat at all? Here's the quick answer: as long as the Joe Liebermans are the exception and not the rule in your party, you guys will continue to lose, and lose badly. Well, now you'll lose even worse because you guys won't be able to cheat any more.

But I'm sure you will continue to try to cheat. Hell you've been doing it for over 50 years; why stop now? That would be a shame, because if your screwing with elections gets brazen enough, there will likely be rioting and general violence. You folks will have blood on your hands.

And it would also be very bad for you because our side owns all the guns. Maybe that's why you guys are always trying to abrogate the Second Amendment...

Drop Dead,

LearnedFoot

P.S. V-Toed-Bill sends his regards: "Eat shit and die, bastards!"

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