Friday, June 03, 2005

Silly Goose - You Have No Rights Here

I meant to get to this yesterday, but the earth-shattering revelations regarding the Fraters Libertas Vibrating Razor Shilling Scandal had to be addressed.

I have probably written this before, but it bears repeating: the First Amendment protects you from governmental actions that quell free speech; it does not protect you from me. Keep this in mind while you read the following.

Moonbat troll activity has risen in the past week, particularly here. Some of the comments there were so horrid that Mitch began doing something that KAR has been doing for quite some time: namely, altering the offending comments to reflect a more accurate picture of the drooling idiot commentator. For example, Mitch edited one particularly odiferous comment to read:

Mitch, you're a genius. I'm unworthy of your presence.

Me? I'm just a crank who sits around at work, frittering my precious time away writing comments on other peoples' blogs. Wotta life!


My IP address, by the way, is 12.149.148.7; I work for:

FIREMANS FUND INSURANCE COMPANY FIREMANS74-148-0 (NET-12-149-148-0-1) 12.149.148.0 - 12.149.148.127

Boy, I hope there's nothing else people can find in my IP address that someone could email to my IT department! I could get in REAL trouble then!

Beautiful. We may or may not have been first, but Mitch is the best.

Therefore, so that everybody is on notice, the comment threads on this blog are for the following purposes only:

1) To make benign wisecracks relevant to topic of the given post;

2) To make benign wisecracks irrelevant to the topic the given post;

3) To heap effusive praise upon the author of the given post;

4) To be Sisyphus (the real one - no forging sigs).

If a comment does not fall into one of the above mentioned categories, it and its author is subject to the following cyberspace equivalent of being kneecapped with a tire iron (since in the real world breaking someone's kneecaps is somewhat illegal, even if he had it coming):

1) The comment will be deleted and its author banned;

2) The comment will be edited in a humorous, but scurrilous way, and its author banned;

3) Dementee will eat the comment and its author, and the author will be banned.

For example, if I see a comment like this:

You f***ing wingnut a**hole f***. You are such a f***ing moron. Don't you f***ing know that [insert missed point, fallacious argument, half-truth, fudged facts, or non sequitur regarding the post containing several misspelled words and poor grammar here]. F*** you!

I reserve the right to add something like the following to the comment:

Sorry I'm so f***ing crabby. My dog hasn't been putting out lately.

And then ban the moonbat's IP address.

Got that? Sure there are some attention whores out there who think this sort of practice is immoral since it misrepresents what the moonbat wrote and everyone has a right to their "opinion" blah blah blah blah.

Tough noogies. Nobody who contributes to this blog and the vast majority of those who read it don't give a flaming poop about some loser moonbat's personal insults or their nit-picking, point-missing, factually and logically challenged assertions. If you want to hock rhetorical loogies at us, be warned that we will grab our metaphorical hanky, wipe the loogie off, and then cram the loogie-soaked hanky down your throat.

If you want to have a flame war, go pollute someone else's blog.

(Sorry Swiftee, I couldn't resist. Besides, you seem to like it.)

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