Monday, September 12, 2005

OPG: %&!!##$!

NOTE: Today, Obnoxious Packer Guy offers the first installment of his weekly recaps of NFL action. Since OPG was raised by merchant marines in the locker room of a meat packing plant in Cudahy, this post may not be suitable for those with tender sensibilities. Reader discretion is advised.

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Packer Review: Week 1 Breakdown.

F**king f**k f**k! Shit ass twat...CRAP CRAP CRAP!!!!

Rat farts! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRGH!

Crotch piss shit f**k! C*ck of c*cks!

Crotch crotch crotch crotch CROTCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!

[pant pant]

Let's check out the other action from yesterday's games.

Oh look: the San Fran-f**king-cisco Forty-f**king-Niners, the crappiest team in all of football last year, are on pace to win 16 games!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG!

And the Bears actually scored an offensive touchdown!

Wait a second...

Tampa Bay beat whom? In the Metrodome?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Oh, that makes me feel better. Much better.

I now feel almost as good as Nihilist's bookie does this morning.

UPDATE: Just noticed something interesting.

I outgained Vikings running back Michael Bennett yesterday:

Bennett: 6 carries for -1 yards.

OPG: 0 carries for 0 yards.

MEMO TO DREW ROSENHAUS: Check your e-mail: I'm available as a client.

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