Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Moron Mail

Often you will see a letter to the editor that - while it does drip with stupidity - is so devoid of substance, that it is the rhetorical equivalent of a fart. Not just any fart, mind you. It's a lot like one of those super-airy movie theater popcorn farts. The letter's very presence on the editorial page of a large-circulation daily forces one to wonder what exact mental defect caused the editor to think that such a letter's slobbering simplicity would somehow enrich the public discourse.

Which brings us to this:

The curse of the Bush

Coincidence or curse? Vikings fans, you be the judge.

On Oct. 29, 2004, Minnesota Vikings had a 5-1 record. Head Coach Mike Tice was on top of the world, feeling confident, virile; no one could touch him.

That day in Minneapolis he introduced President Bush and presented him with a personalized Vikings jersey with the number 1 on the back.

Since then, the Vikings have gone 4-10.

Coincidence or curse? Vikings fans, you be the judge.

K. J0hn Br@dl3y, Minneapolis.

One can almost smell sense the writer's smug satisfaction of his own cleverness.

Except that it's not clever. The "Bush curse" is a trope that's been circulating ever since the Vikings' first loss following Bush's meeting with Tice.

And it's hardly original (which is a prerequisite to being "clever"). None other than the Strib's resident non-simian proclaimed the curse last February (column has been removed from the archives, but you can find the fully fisked version here):

Keep your nose out of politics. Your predecessor made every Democrat football fan in Minnesota swear a blue streak when Coach Mike Tice presented a Vikings jersey to the Republican president at the height of last fall's election campaign. Bad timing: The team tanked after that, the state wound up in the Democratic column and Moss mooned Green Bay.
I'm sorry, but if you are coming up with some "witty observation" 8 months after the Nonmonkey (not exactly a rocket surgeon) poopered out the same lame joke himself, you have the mental acuity of a fart.

Oh, and by the way: the status of the "Bush curse" qua curse, all depends on your perspective. For example, if you are a Packer fan like me Obnoxious Packer Guy, the tanking of the Vikings is more like a blessing.

One more thing. George Bush doesn't seem to have a deleterious effect on other football teams. For example:

The New England Patriots won the Super Bowl in 2004.

As per custom, President Bush invited the Pats to the White House, and met with them.

In 2005, the Patriots won the Super Bowl again.

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