Once again the Foot goes two for three; but this time I dragged Flash along with me on my coattails. Flash's new strategy of picking the same teams as me worked well for him as this is the first week he managed to come out above the Mendoza line.
And now for your weekly installment of football edification, here's Obnoxious Packer Guy.
Football is a silly game. Instead of breaking down last night's game - or even thinking about it - I will recite a poem for you:
Kublai Khan by Samuel Taylor Coleridge
In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.
So twice five miles of fertile ground
With walls and towers were girdled round:
And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;
And here were forests ancient as the hills,
Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.
OPG: See, isn't this better? Why would you want to listen to me rant about bad-run-blocking-this, and dropped-passes-that, when I can transport you to some Eden with "sinuous rills"?
But oh! that deep romantic chasm which slanted
Down the green hill athwart a cedarn cover!
A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
And from this chasm, with ceaseless turmoil seething,
As if this earth in fast thick pants were breathing,
A mighty fountain momently was forced:
Amid whose swift half-intermitted burst
OPG: Burst like a Panther receiver through the Packer's secondary!
Sorry, I'll continue.
Huge fragments vaulted like rebounding hail,
Or chaffy grain beneath the thresher's flail:
And 'mid these dancing rocks at once and ever
It flung up momently the sacred river.
Five miles meandering with a mazy motion
Through wood and dale the sacred river ran,
Then reached the caverns measureless to man,
And sank in tumult to a lifeless ocean:
OPG: Symbolism: "lifeless ocean" = the NFC North
And 'mid this tumult Kubla heard from far
Ancestral voices prophesying war!
The shadow of the dome of pleasure
Floated midway on the waves;
Where was heard the mingled measure
From the fountain and the caves.
It was a miracle of rare device,
A sunny pleasure-dome with caves of ice!
OPG: More symbolism: "Rare device" = the Packers defense actually forcing a turnover.
Again. I'm sorry to have injected my bitterness into this beautiful lyric.
A damsel with a dulcimer
In a vision once I saw:
It was an Abyssinian maid,
And on her dulcimer she played,
Singing of Mount Abora.
Could I revive within me
Her symphony and song,
To such a deep delight 'twould win me,
OPG: Win me. Win her. Just WIN SOMETHING!
That with music loud and long,
I would build that dome in air,
That sunny dome! those caves of ice!
And all who heard should see them there,
And all should cry,
OPG: Beware! Beware! Ahmad Carroll is about to get yet ANOTHER FREAKING PASS INTERFERENCE PENALTY!!!!!!!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed,
And drunk the milk of Paradise.
OPG: I need to drink something. But it ain't going to be no milk.