Thursday, October 13, 2005

Reflections on Vikingsboatorgygate Day at KAR

Some time ago, psychologists conducted an experiment to determine the primal motivations in rats. In each rat's cage they set up two levers. One lever would dispense a food pellet each time a rat engaged it. The second lever sent an impulse to an apparatus embedded in the pleasure center of each rat's brain. The scientists would then record how many times the rats would push the food lever versus the pleasure lever.

What they found was most, if not all the rats, would just continuously pound on the pleasure lever until they passed out from exhaustion.

After yesterday, I now understand those rats.

Yes, yesterday was a big day for KAR. Links to this post from a fark.com thread, Fraters Libertas, several discussion boards (including the one hosted by the Vikings themselves), and a website called badjocks.com drove KAR's traffic to record levels. Indeed our site meter now abstractly resembles a Viking player from the crotch up, reclining on a yacht:


But that really isn't the true mark of success. Oh no.

You know those hundreds of annoying forwarded joke e-mails you get every month? You know: the ones that you delete almost immediately because a) the guy who honored you by including your e-mail address in his obscenely large distribution list has a history of sending you unfunny, time-wasting crap; or 2) you have better things to do than read the same joke that's been circling the internet for a year 700 times?

Yesterday, Nihilist Wannabee Bill received one of those e-mails.

It was a copy of this post.

That's right! I have joined the ranks of the thousands of anonymous losers who write those missives that are usually appended with "If pass this along to 10 of your friends, some epileptic baby in the third world won't die," and are eventually attributed to Dennis Miller, George Carlin or Dag Hammerskjold.

I've hit the big time baby!

Bill is organizing a Lake Minnetonka cruise to celebrate. All of KARnation is invited.

Except Sisyphus. He's been known to bogart the hookers.

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