Saturday, March 18, 2006

WAR!

So this is the way it's going to be.

Bring it, bitch.

Here are the Top 11 facts that Nihilist Neglected to tell you:

11. When I offered The Nihilist the cheat sheet, he said "I already have it."

10. On the same quiz last year, Team Nihilist got a 6. This is the same score that Vince Young got on the Wunderlich.

9. The Nihilist went to Notre Dame.

8. I was one of four people on the team. Why pick on me? Why not pick on Captain Fishsticks, whose contribution was about as useful as his position on gay marriage (to wit: "Hey - why not?")

7. The Nihilist is a shitknob.

6. Atomizer's Dad was on Nihilist's team. Atomizer's Dad is a walking encyclopedia, and most likely carried that team.

5. The only reason The Nihilist is a frequent guest on The Patriot Insider is because he's the only person on the planet that can make Mark Yost's voice seem fit for radio.

4. "A boat made out of waterproof material" sounded like a fake answer choice.

3. Of the two answers Nihilist claims were on the cheat sheet, both were either incomplete or erroneous.

2. Nihilist is jealous because I am taller, manlier and better looking than he is.

1. He benefited from the lack of Brokeback Mountain questions.

THEREFORE:

A state of war now exists between our two blogs. We have recalled our ambassadors. Bill has retreated to the Secret Tactical Photoshop Lab (STaPL) where he will be ramping up our arsenal.

We call on the Mayor to censure The Nihilist in Golf Pants for his outrageous behavior and his slanderous remarks.

We call on Sisyphus to distance himself from this madman.

We call on the Fraters to stop posting their "B" material on the Nihilist's hate blog.

May God have mercy on all of us.

No comments: