11. Refusal of populace to accept Barry Tallackson as personal savior.
10. The Gopher hockey team's performance against Holy Cross in the tournament.
9. Sluggish sales of KAR thongs.
8. Insufficient number of traffic light technology trade magazines.
7. Noted Klansman Robert Byrd.
6. LearnedFoot's erroneous recollection that Warren Burger joined the dissent in Roe v. Wade.
5. The Nihilist in Golf Pants' ongoing irrational disrespect of one of the best blogs around.
4. Fraters' "B" material.
3. Dad's genetic experiment that went horribly horribly awry, resulting in Nancy Pelosi.
2. The mere existence of the Minnesota Vikings.
1. The Nihilist in Golf Pants' ongoing, gag-reflex-inducing sucking up to John Hinderaker.