Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Death

As in "brain death":

Katherine Kersten says our churches are not to be places of social change -- as sought by Methodists, who had the goodwill to marry my wife and me 10 years ago and who are emptying out their pews, according to the columnist, with "cause du jour" concerns over the way we treat our planet and the least among us.

No, what she wrote was that churches should not be places for indulging intellectual fads adorned in stilted double-speak labels like "social justice". And she's right.

Kersten would rather we kneel down to ask, "What is the meaning of my suffering?"

I don't think she suggested kneeling, but she also mentioned (in the same graf cited here) some other personal introspections. I suggest you pay special attention to the one that said "What is the purpose of my life?"

Now there's an idea. What is the meaning behind having to regularly suffer through a tour of the arch, unhappy place that is the Kersten moral universe?

I suppose that someone who confuses "tolerance" for "being a good person" would suffer when venturing out of the fever swamp.

And I'm pretty sure the word "arch" doesn't have the meaning here that you think it does.

Maybe it's some sort of a test?

Huh?

Maybe if I agree to smirk at progressive causes, worship the military, vote Republican, deny the obvious coolness of gay people

STOP THE LETTER!

Uh...

I think I now know why liberal-leaning states are referred to as "blue": the color represents a lack of oxygen to the brain.

and encase myself in a Kersten box of repression, she will finally go away?

RON BURGUNDY: I'm in a glass case of EMOTION!!!!

Because I am ready to do whatever it takes.

How about getting a life?

After all, if I want to hear a defender of one mainline faith talking in superior tones about another mainline faith, I don't need to be able to read.

Remember back when the new pope was being selected? Remember all those assholes - most of them either not Catholic or non-practicing Catholics - who pooped out their ill-considered opinions onto anyone who would listen about what type of pope should succeed John Paul II? "I hope the new pope tolerates abortion!" Remember those fools?

Just sayin'.

I can just pull up a lawn chair with the local knitting circle at a neighborhood block party. Actually, I take that back. They would surely have more taste than that.

???????

That's it. We have a flatline. This guy makes a patient in a persistive vegetative state look like a Mensa candidate. Pull the plug. Time of death: 14:30.

BRIAN DED, MINNEAPOLIS.

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