Monday, June 05, 2006

Moron Mail

Just so you know: we're ashamed that the Dixie Chicks - and this idiot - are from the United States:

The Dixie Chicks' latest CD, "Taking the Long Way," has created a buzz in the music industry and is No. 1 on both the country and pop charts.

JB Doubtless is no doubt pleased.

Considering the group is still "Not Ready to Make Nice" with its country music fans, Americans have seemingly re-embraced these mandolin-playing Texans. And I have apparently embraced country music, or at the very least, the Dixie Chicks.

A) Or perhaps people tend to not look at the party affiliations of artists who make music they like.

B) Nobody gives a shit about you Ryan.

It's been three years since Natalie Maines, the group's lead vocalist, [AKA "The Fat One" -ed.]criticized President Bush on the eve of the Iraq war. While the Dixie Chicks were forced into country music asylum, the group persevered amid death threats and more to produce this politically potent CD.

"Forced into the country music asylum"??? WTF does that mean?

Yeah they sure disappeared into obscurity after that: with all those magazine covers, television interviews etc.

The group's first two singles, one being "Not Ready to Make Nice," were faltering on country radio because of this rift. This angered me, and I went out and bought the CD in defiance.

You know, during the 2004 presidential campaign, I stopped buying Heinz ketchup. That decision wasn't so much based on the presidential race as it was on the fact that the media spotlight on Teresa Kerry revealed her to be a tremendous loony toon. I didn't think that she needed any more money.

But I didn't write a letter to the editor about it. "Hey! Look at me! I'm sticking it to the man -er - woman! Yay me!!!!"

Call it a meager political statement; call it a simple impulse buy; call it what you like.

How about I call it a "pathology"? Masochism? Self esteem issues?

The CD hit home and a new Dixie Chicks fan was born.

I had the same experience with Iron Maiden's "Powerslave." Although I bought it because I loved the song "Rime of the Ancient Mariner" and John J Miller's recommendation. Not because Bruce Dickinson was mistreated by Ozzy Osborne's bitchy wife.

And I sure and hell didn't write the newspapers to let them know about my, er, revelations.

As pop culture popularized politically incorrect songs -- such as Toby Keith's "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue," the Dixie Chicks have given us a politically correct cry.

Oh, political correctness is a good thing now? We're through the looking glass here people.

We do have the freedom of speech, and we do have a right to discuss our views in public. No person should have to face personal -- let alone public -- persecution for beliefs that differ from a perceived mainstream.

OK, so in Ryan's topsy turvy world, people who say things he agrees with have "freedom of speech," but those who may take issue with the Fat Dixie Chick's brain-dead droolings from a stage in a foreign country (how courageous!) are "persecutors"?

When you look up "canard" in the dictionary it says "OH LOOK: ANOTHER RETARD WROTE A THOUGHT-FREE SELF-IMPORTANT TRACT THAT THE STRIB DEEMED THE 'LETTER OF THE F***ING DAY'!"

The Dixie Chicks are true Americans who have stood up for what the United States was founded on: freedom.

And all those others who disagree with them should shut up: they're stifling free speech!

RYAN SLAPNUTS, MINNEAPOLIS.

Dumbass.

The Marketplace of Ideas is out of stock of everything in Ryan's world.

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