Friday, July 14, 2006

More Moron Mail

Hey! Look everybody: someone who has spent the last 30 years in an Heir Conditioner:

Democrats in disarray: Paper presses an agenda

Oh yeah. This one's going to be good...

Is the Star Tribune trying to take down the Democratic Party before the midterm elections?

And now we all enjoy a hearty laugh!

If not, why all the bad press about the DFL candidates?

Yes we've never ever seen any bad press about any Republican candidates in the Strib. Ever.

Wednesday's headline about Mike Hatch and Matt Entenza wasn't even worth a mention, let alone a front-page lead.

Well, actually - if memory serves - MDE broke this story, like, 9 months ago. That little factoid seems to beg the question not whether the story was worth a mention, but rather, why did the Strib sit on the story for so long before reporting it?

Since it has nothing to do with these candidates' positions on any topic, could it be that the paper is doing its best to smear DFL candidates with statewide appeal such as Hatch, Entenza and Keith Ellison?

Did the dustups with the law of Senator Rod Grams' son have anything to do with "the issues"? As I recall, the local press reported THE SHIT out of that story right up until the day the Minnesota electorate suffered a brief bout of temporary insanity and foisted St. Wellstone! Mark Dayton on the Senate and an unsuspecting America. Then they immediately dropped the story.

Were you outraged then Terry? Or were you laughing your ass off?

And since you might be experienced on the matter, how does one laugh one's ass "off" when his or her head is in there?

Why don't you try being a class act, as this paper once was, and just report the facts?

Um, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't Entenza's little investigation into Hatch's background technically "a fact"?

And you, Terry, wouldn't know a "class act" if one accidentally tripped over you while you were laying in the gutter.

If I wanted entertainment news on the front page, I would subscribe to Variety.

Yes the typical daily Iraq Rolling Death Count Report (SHOCKING NEWS: PEOPLE ARE HURT AND DIE IN ARMED CONFLICTS!) is much better front page fodder than this.


This whole meme reminds me of that ubiquitous bumper sticker that graced a lot of Geo Metros and rusted Yugos a few years back. It read something like:

The media is only as biased as its rich corporate owners

or something to that effect. Putting its flawed premise aside (the institutional bias of a given news organization usually has more to do with who makes the editorial decisions than it does who owns the controlling share of its stock), this overly-cute little piece of mind-poop never failed to evoke a smile when I thought about such arch-conservative media moguls as Sumner Redstone (CBS Viacom), Ted Turner (CNN) and Michael Eisner (ABC-Cap Cities).

Tell you what sport, why don't you try looking at who the Strib Editorial Goons endorse for the midterm elections - when they publish them - and get back to us. If history is any guide, their monolithic DFL endorsements will make this letter look even stupider than I just did. Until then, go crawl back into your Skinner Box and suck your thumb like a good DFL bobo.

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