Monday, October 09, 2006

Aftermath

LEARNEDFOOT: OK, people. Let's try and get our arms around the level of destruction from the blast. I need damage reports.

OPG: The official KAR beer stash appears to be intact. Whew. We really dodged a bullet there!

LF: Shut up, you! Bill? What about external damage. Did the blast affect any other blogs or Thunderjournals?

BILL: Well...the blast may have taken out Bogus Doug, but there's no way of telling for sure. Our spotters are saying that 50% of Joe Tucci's back hair has been burned off - that amounts to about 73 pounds of burnt hair....

BILL: One moment...

LF: What's up? Are you getting any readings on -

BILL: ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHH!!!!!! Ryan Rhodes' ass took a big - I repeat: BIG - hit of radiation.

LF: Oh my! May God forgive us.

LF: Fred the Head? Any other external damage?

HEAD OF ALFREDO GARCIA: It appears the the radiation has caused Molly Ivins to mutate into some sort of horrible Jabba the Hutt-like creature.

LF: Please confirm...

HOAG: Nope, sorry. No mutation. That's just how she looks.

LF: Dementee - what damage have we sustained internally?

DEMENTEE: RADIATION PLAY HAVOC WITH SIDEBAR!!!!! ALL BILL GRAPHIC GONE!!!!!

LF: Fortunately, he's moving those to another server. What else on the sidebar?

DEMENTEE: RAINBOW OF FLAVAZ BLOGROLL MESSED UP!!!!! VERY DISTURBING!!!!!

LF: Yikes! I think there's more than one blogger that's going to be pissed. Well, we can't fix those right now. Let's concentrate on what we can fix.

DEMENTEE: ALL FUTURE MOB SOIL AND WATER COMMISSIONER DEBATE THREADS DESTROYED!!!!!

LF: Eh. Good riddance. Those debates sucked anyway.

DEMENTEE: EVERYTHING ELSE LOOK A-OK!!!!

LF: Good. Well, I guess we did dodge a bullet. OK. Let's all brace ourselves for the coming political fallout and possible sanctions from the international blogging community.

BILL: ...And that time is now boss. I got Kofi Annan on line one and Jimmy Carter on line two!

LF: [Gazing skyward] Somebody up there must love me. "Dodged a bullet" indeed...

Hello, Mr. Secretary General...

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