Friday, March 30, 2007

MilF Tips: TPC at Valleywood #1

NOTE: This is the first installment of a series created for KAR's Expanded MilF Hype Program. Each week, we will present a breakdown of one hole on the MilF's home course: the majestic and hallowed TPC at Valleywood. Print them out and collect them all to make a groovy "course book" just like the pros use!


VALLEYWOOD #1
"Morning Train"


Playing 349 from the tips or 330 from the MilF tees, #1 is a solid if unspectacular opening hole. The fairway bends ever so slightly to the right leading to a deep, elevated green The best position for your first shot would be to the center or left side of the fairway. If you miss, miss left, as a stand of mature oak trees that lines the right side of the fairway will seal your doom.

Complicating your problems should you hit your drive right, is the fact that the driving range is right next door. Meaning you will either 1) never find your ball amid the approximately 40,000 range balls that have come to rest in the area or 2) cheat, by playing one of the better-positioned range balls, hoping nobody else in your group notices.

The deep, narrow green has three tiers, two of the same elevation separated by a gully in the middle. If the pin is back, make sure you get your approach shot to at least the middle of the green, otherwise it's as good as a 3-putt for you, Mary.

FOOT'S SECRET TIP: If you are erratic or underconfident with your driver off the tee, tee off #1 with a 2 or 3 iron. Even big hitters can't reach the elevated green, and since the slope up to the green is long and steep, the sacrifice in distance won't matter that much. If you have any testosterone at all, you'll still be hitting less than a 7-iron into the green anyway.

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