Monday, March 19, 2007

What if Exxon Shrugged?

Minnesotans love to giggle with glee about the drunken misadventures of Wisconsinites. If there's ever a story about an inebriated "Sconnie" running out the 16th floor window of a hotel, or a drunken tryst with a farm animal, you can be sure to hear about it all over the local radio, newspapers or weblogs.

As a brief aside it should be noted that when these sorts of things are done by Minnesotans, more often than not the perp is a sober Lutheran type. Personally, I think it's much more embarrassing to get caught porking a donkey when you're in complete control of your faculties than if you've had one pop too many. My guess is that it has something to do with the natives' inability to hold their liquor. You can't do dumb things if you've passed out after your third beer.
But I digress.

It's bad enough to get hammered and do it doggie style with a cow. But in that case there's only 2 victims - the very disappointed cow, and its molester's reputation. However, when you vote drunk, everybody in the state gets stuck with a governor like Wisconsin's Jim Doyle.

Noted Marquette Alumnus Denbo alerted me to one of Doyle's tax proposals over the weekend, and I've gotta say that it makes an inebriated pig schtupper look mighty reasonable. Here's a taste:

A boost to the state's transportation fund, including more than $200 million for I-94 reconstruction from Milwaukee to Illinois. Fine so far; so what's the problem? Doyle wants it funded by Big Oil and increased vehicle registration fees.

While most people don't have a problem building roads on Big Oil's dime, Doyle plans to defer the cost of infrastructure to Big Oil in the form of - what else? - a tax, while forcing the oil companies to not pass the higher cost to customers.

This plan is so poorly thought-out that some officials aren't even sure whether it's legal.


It should raise flags whenever an editorial appearing in the Milwaukee Jenital says a new tax is "poorly thought out"; even if it is a guest editorial.

So Diamond Jim Doyle wants to tax the profits of Big Oil, and force Big Oil to keep another set of false books solely for the perusal of Wisconsin's tax authorities. This idea is so breathtakingly stupid from both its ignorance of basic economics to its out and out arrogance, the mind reels.

I think it would be great if this stupid tax was passed, and then the powers that be at Big Oil all decided that Wisconsin was no longer a market where they wished to do business. Maybe they could stage a 10 day production strike, timed right before the next even-year election.

That would be sweet.

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