Wednesday, February 06, 2008

My Enormous Caucus

On the local news last night there was a shot of a woman running into the building where her precinct caucus was being held. She looked at the camera and exclaimed in such a manner so as to leave no doubt of her sincerety, "I am SO excited!!!!" And I thought to myself, get a life.


Oh we're told these nice platitudes: "You can make a difference" or "History belongs to those who show up," but I prefer to think that I make a difference at things that really matter, by being a good dad, husband, employee, neighbor and so on. People who show up for those sorts of duties create the real positive influence on society. Meeting with a bunch of like-minded folks to discuss how you can get someone elected who will make the government force other people to make the proverbial Better Nation (whatever that is) - or at least prevent the party opposite from destroying it - doesn't rank high on my list of imparatives. American government was viewed at its beginning as a necessary evil; but since it has morphed into this all-encompassing mania to build Utopia (whatever that is), or to at least prevent the apocolypse.

And then this last year came. Now, in addition to being an Epic Battle for the Soul of the Nation, our election process has become March Madness, the NFL playoffs; sports for dorks who don't like sports.

OMG who's gonna win? What strategy will Romney employ to beat back Huckabee's capture of the evangelicals? Guiliani had a bad game plan! My prefered candidate lost - I'm depressed.

This has all gotten extremely annoying to me. So much so, that the mere thought of having to sit through a meeting in a middle school gymnasium watching people talk about platform planks makes me physically ill.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not denegrating caucus-goers. I'm just saying it's not for everyone, so spare me the lectures about how vital it is to attend and participate. Being one voice among millions (especially in a process where some voices are weighted much more heavily than others) makes about as much difference on the outcome of this stage of the game as does one screaming cheesehead sitting in the bleachers of Lambeau Field has on the outcome of any given football game. That is to say, not much. The players still fully control their own destiny.

By all means, if you are an activist, get all amped up or whatever. But please understand that I, like most others, am not one. Judging by many of the things I've been reading on the blogs this morning you all had a great night last night. But while you were listening to some guy introduce a plank to deport all illegal aliens / give all illegal aliens the right to vote (depending on which caucus you attended), I was introducing my own plank to the fetching Mrs. Foot.

So I had a pretty exciting night too.

(And yes, I have been waiting a very long time to use that line.)

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