Thursday, December 11, 2008

Henceforth, All Our Communications Shall Be in Writing

[The Notorious B.I.L. (BILL) is reclining in a barcalounger reading a newspaper at KAR HQ. LearnedFoot (FOOT) enters.]

FOOT: 'Sup Bill

THE NOTORIOUS B.I.L.: Nothing. What is up with you, Foot?

FOOT: Nuttin'. Whatcha reading?

BILL: Oh, just the Sheboygan Press.

FOOT: Keeping up on all the hap's in Wisconsin's Lake Michigan shore communities?

BILL: Yes. It's a hobby of mine.

FOOT: I see. Anything interesting?

BILL: Why yes. It appears that a sex offender was cleared by the Sheboygan Common Council to live in a certain north side neighborhood. Needless to say, the locals are not pleased.

FOOT: Hey! I drove through Sheboygan once. Maybe I know the guy. What's his name?

BILL: Pheuk Kue.

FOOT: Excuse me????

BILL: I said, Pheuk Kue.

FOOT: What the hell is wrong with you now?

BILL: Nothing!

FOOT: All I asked was what the guy's name was -

BILL: And I told you.

FOOT: So what's his name?

BILL: Pheck.

FOOT: Pheck who?

BILL: Pheuk Kue.

FOOT: [Outraged] Pheck me???!!!

BILL: No, stupid. Pheuk Kue.

FOOT: ARRRRRGH!1!1!1!1 Prepare to be punched in yer pie hole!

[BILL shoves the newspaper into FOOT's face.]

BILL: Here you moron! Just read the story.

[FOOT snatches the paper, reads the article, and blushes.]

FOOT: Oh. Heh. The guys name really is Pheuk Kue.

BILL: See?

FOOT: Yeah. Uh...sorry for the assault...

BILL: No offense taken.

FOOT: Soooooo. What do you think this guy did? Do you suppose he Phuc some Bich?

BILL: Dunno. Probably molested a child or something.

FOOT: Maybe he fukubukuro?

BILL: First of all, I don't think that's illegal. Second, I thought I made it clear to you that that word is Japanese for "lucky sack".

FOOT: Ho ho! I'll bet that Pheuk sure thought his sack was lucky while he was pounding it up against that buckaroo's aso.

BILL: I'm sorry Foot. This conversation can no longer serve any useful purpose. [Exits.]

FOOT: Fukudome!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please let me know if you're looking for a article writer for your blog. You have some really good posts and I believe I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I'd
absolutely love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine.
Please send me an e-mail if interested. Cheers!

my web-site - NFL Jerseys Cheap

Anonymous said...

We are a group of volunteers and opening a brand new scheme in our community.
Your website offered us with useful info to work on.
You've performed an impressive task and our entire neighborhood can be grateful to you.

Feel free to visit my blog post :: Air Max Pas Cher