Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Maybe You're Right, Maybe I'm Crazy: KAR in 2008 - Part 5

5 months. One page.

MAY

5/1 - Ron Paul demonstrates the superiority of his candidacy by beaming his book directly into the brains of his supporters two weeks before its release.

If KAR is a "digital lifeboat," then Ryan is the virtual little man in the canoe.

5/2 - "The AP neglects to mention Brodkorb's past work as research director for the Republican Party of Minnesota". Given that this quote was lifted from the Minnesota Monitor, you pretty much know how the story ends.

5/5 - College prof routinely gets her ass handed to her in her classroom. Just like some Iowa housewives routinely get hands on their asses in restrooms.

5/7 - Local poopblogger finally gets his long-overdue recognition.

5/8 - Local assblogger finally gets his long-overdue recognition.

5/9 - Local punk-assblogger finally gets his overdue recognition. The defining-down of the term "hero" trifecta is complete.

LarnedFoot and the Order of the Pinkos. Post is too awesome for a wisecrack. Favre stays retired, bangs Iowa cougar in the men's room.

5/12 - Greatest comment thread in the history of the internet.

Demonstrating that there are no depths to which KAR cannot sink, LearnedFoot liveblogs The Bachelor. (Sample: "9:55 - Oh gag.")

5/13 - Dumpsters discover a new venue where they can tell everyone how much they hate Michele Bachmann. KARnies scramble to find a term more descriptive than "loser."

5/14 - Leftyblogger laments "pursuit of happiness" in Declaration of Independence. "Liberty" last seen loading its gun.

5/15 - A KAR Year in Review first: linking to a blog post outside of KAR - because, quite simply, it is so unbelievably full of win. Truly, May was Ryan Rhodes' Golden Age of ThunderJournaling.

5/20 - HA HA! Call me SENATOR PANTSUIT!1!!1!!!

DNC contract requires blue food, clean and spacious restroom stalls for Iowa delegation.

Post title of the year.

5/27 - This is not a post.

5/28 - And the role of LearnedFoot will be played by Chris Noth.

5/29 - This also is not a post.

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