Flushing the Bowels of Time: KAR 2008 in Review Part 7

All of 'em.

JULY

7/1 - ♫ We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship- screeeeeetch *rewind* We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship- screeeeeetch *rewind* We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship- screeeeeetch DIE DIE DIE!!!!!♫

Leftist group hosts an RNC lawn sign design contest. KAR Enters. Doesn't win. Brett Favre still retired.

CREW in July: "Investigate Norm Coleman with a Roto-rooter for living in a converted basement storage room!!1!!1!!" CREW in December: "Your word that you and your staff had no contact with Gov. Blagojevich is good enough for us Mr. Obama sir!"

7/2 - FAIL graphic full of WIN.

7/3 - LearnedFoot erects The Great Sausage Poll of '08. Penis.

Boobies never fail? Really? What about flapjack titties?

7/7 - Bothering Foot with your socialist drivel while he's eating buffalo wings? That's a forkin'.

7/8 - The "one word" meme arrives at KAR. FuckingahousewifefromIowain-thebathroomsurprisinglyabsent.

A dirty mushroom we can believe in.

7/10 - Black hole. White hole. Whatever.

7/11 - KARNation loves to swallow the Italian sausage. Dirty whoahs.

7/12 - The scandalous $600 / month rent Norm Coleman paid to live in a hovel turns out to be $100 too much, or $874,400 less than Al Franken and Air America took from a children's charity.

7/15 - Jesse Ventura hints at the possibility that he feels as if he hasn't been getting enough attention lately. In other news, Brett Favre wants everyone to know that he "super-duper happy" to be retired.

7/17 - ♫ I went back to the Dells / But my lake was gone ♫

7/18 - Brett Favre demonstrates his desire to remain retired by texting the Vikings' coaching staff 37 times. U WNT ME 2 PLAY 4 U? LOLZ!

7/23 - Opening lines for the 2008 MilF come out. Teh Andee's team given roughly the same odds as Favre staying retired. KARNation's odds a little better; more in the range of scoring a MilFy cougar from Iowa in a Metrodome bathroom stall.

7/24 - Morons who write letters to the Strib are killing Mother Earth. Won't somebody think of the children???!!!

7/25 - The 2008 MilF: KARNation in Golf Pants retains Lord Jones' Pitcher in a rout. In fact, the margin of victory was so one-sided, every spectator left halfway through and got laid in the clubhouse restroom. (Prelude. The Liveblog. The inevitable result.)

7/29 - Having accomplished all there is to accomplish in the milieu of blogging, Obnoxious Packer Guy retires with the dignity, grace and certitude of a 17-year veteran.

7/30 - Insisting that he's committed to pursuing a life after football, Brett Favre applies for reinstatement. OPG still retired.